Everybody abandon de Mook
May 10, 2013 By
Some people born stupidy, live stupidy, and dem gon dead stupidy. Somehow, in de Guyanese society, de name Mook Lall does come to people mind when dem hear that statement.
Jokes of de week
May 7, 2013 By
The opposition parties FLAPNU and KFC had a whole extra week to get dem figures right fuh de budget debates and then seh dem mek a mistake wid de transport budget, so de whole budget get cut. This is a lesson not to trust dotish people.
Then last year the opposition vote fuh de Specialty Hospital project and this year dem vote against it. It don’t look as though dem can mek up dem mind bout any ting in Parliament. De only ting Rum Jhaat sure bout is collectin money from de Feathers people.
Hen Rico get a television licence since 1997 and he can’t get any ting up and runnin yet. But de Hen busy protestin bout radio and television licence wid Mook Lall, Baddamn, Ben Cup and de people dem who de Mook pay and give food to tek part in de demonstration. What de demonstration demonstrate is that de Hen should not be complainin bout any ting.
Mahi Saul admit that he thief de UGSS money and when de people from de media question he, he seh he thief de money in de right way. See Rum and Haze Hell at de UG Bursary gon run fuh de UGSS presidency next year.
De people at de U.S. State Department open dem mouth and bad talk de Guyana guvament fuh press freedom and human rights. Well Donald put dem to dem place. When de U.S. can fix Guantanamo Bay wid all dem prisoners who dem holdin down there wid out trial, then dem can start talkin.
And when de U.S. can solve immigration problems, fix de Middle East, turn around de economy, find jobs fuh people, stop sellin guns to young people, calm down North Korea, and pay back China all dem billions what dem borrowin, then dem can start lecturin other people.
Ting-a-ling-a-ling…friend tell friend…mattie tell mattie! De other joke of de week is wid Kiss Man Soon jumpin to fight Mal Come at de Shitty Hall. Well, after de expired mayor mek lil peace between de two of dem, de Man Kisser decide fuh kiss up Mal Come.
De story of Rum Jhaat and Rue Well
May 7, 2013 By
Ever since de KFC leader Rum Jhaat blow a bank employee, then blow Baddamn and Mook Lall, it look as though he get a lil quiet now. De blows dem was too much fuh he mouth, so he usin it less these last few days.
But it look like Rum Jhaat resort to he hands now, so he writin long letters in de Stabber rag and de Kocheur mud paper. One of dem was a long love-hate letter to one of he old-time buddy body blower Rue Well.
No body ain’t sure what really gone wrong between de two blowers, but one does blow plenty hot air in Parliament and de other does blow a lotta long letters in both de rag and de mud papers, writin dem from a cake shop where he does always bum free tings fuh eat and drink.
But somewhere along de way they end up blowin one another and dem both vex up wid each other. Rue Well vex wid de KFC fuh abstainin from a vote and Rum Jhaat vex wid Rue Well fuh writin a long letter against de KFC.
De plan now is fuh both Rum Jhaat and Rue Well to come together and blow out all de hot air at one another in one place. Freddie Kissmansoon already volunteer to come as de referee, since he now gettin in to boxin.
Ting-a-ling-a-ling…friend tell friend…mattie tell mattie! And look out fuh Rue Well blowin more letters. Rue Well seh since Rum Jhaat abstain from de votin, he must now do more blowin to mek up!
Rum Jhaat get a blow and he whistle
April 26, 2013 By
Flo Rida sing a song name “Whistle”. Rum Jhaat fall in love wid that song since he hear it de first time. Not because he like de music. But because he like de part that Flo Rida sing bout blowin and whistlin. But Rum Jhaat get a blow and he start whistlin right away.
Since then, Rum Jhaat blowin and whistlin all de time. Not plenty people does get to blow and whistle at Rum Jhaat age. So Rum Jhaat is a lucky man, especially when yuh lookin like he, and especially when yuh does dribble a lot when yuh blowin and whistlin, like he.
A bank employee call Rum Jhaat and blow he wid some ting and mek he feel nice. Rum Jhaat turn around and blow Mook Lall and Baddamn wid de same ting and both of them feel nice. De three of them decide fuh blow one another wid de same ting and all of them feel even nicer. Dem feel so nice after blowin one another that dem decide fuh whistle bout it in de Kocheur mud paper.
When de story buss out, de bank boss call de Kocheur mud paper and blow them apart fuh whistlin lies. Mook Lall and Baddamn try to blow back Rum Jhaat fuh blowin dem in de first place. But Rum Jhaat didn’t want that kinda blowin. Rum Jhaat seh he gon blow back de bank employee instead.
Ting-a-ling-a-ling…friend tell friend…mattie tell mattie! De real problem is that Rum Jhaat always want fuh blow Winston, but Winston too smart and he ain’t tekkin no blowin from Rum Jhaat! And after Rum Jhaat couldn’t blow Winston alone, he try fuh blow Winston and Keith at de same time!
UG want more money but can’t account fuh it
April 19, 2013 By
Every time yuh talk to a UG student yuh always bound to hear a complain – no proper library, no proper classrooms, no proper lecturer, no proper labs, no proper ground, no proper dorms, and no proper facilities.
It look like every ting bad on de campus nowadays, even de minibus drivers and conductors dem who does want to charge de students extra money as soon as de sun go down.
But de same time de student body call fuh more money from the government budget is de same time Green Jah and Rum Jhaat seh dem gon cut de budget. Yet both Green Jah and Rum Jhaat seh dem want to change UG. It look like dem want to change it to UGLY, but then a group of students seh that is how de campus is anyway… as well as some of de people who does wuk pun de campus and who does go to pick up people.
Before yuh coulda blink, two staff get send home wid immediate effect because dem can’t account fuh de money.
See Rum seh he can’t see where de money gone and Haze Hell seh she in a haze and couldn’t see what See Rum was doing wid de money.
One of de accounts staff member at UGLY seh de chief accountant was de chief cook and bottle washer fuh de missin funds. But another accounts staff blame de bursar – he seh de bursar used to buss up de safe wid de money and give de chief cook and bottle washer fuh cook up de books.
Ting-a-ling-a-ling… friend tell friend… mattie tell mattie! So UGLY gone from one problem to another. Dem ain’t got Freddie Kissmansoon to thief de books, but now See Rum and Haze Hell thiefin de money!
Opposition need jail time not more time
April 12, 2013 By
De Bell Crier don seh a long time since de budget announce in Parliament that de KFC and FLAPNU ain’t got anything to bad talk. Since de Budget debate start, dem been strugglin big time to find anyting wrong wid de budget.
But de KFC and FLAPNU members determine not to give up and now dem asking fuh more time in Parliament after dem already had two weeks. But what dem really need is not time in Parliament but time in jail fuh all de Guyanese people time and money that dem been wastin fuh de last two weeks.
Rum Jhaat come wid a big scissors, which end up cuttin he own mouth. Kydney Allcock talk till he cock up de people in Rupununi. And Sus Penders seh de budget should be cut by 35 per cent, which is de same percentage at which he brains and other tings wukkin.
Now Val-eerie Low seh de budget ignore development in de hinterland, but a reporter in Parliament seh Low had look high when she seh that. De reporter seh he used to wuk with Mook Lall and that is just how de Mook does look when he high.
And finally Lie Man Nagga Man, break he silence and seh de KFC gon cut bad projects, waste and extravagance from de budget. Comin to tink of it, that is just why Nagga Man not in the PPP/C anymore. Even de PEE NC had reject he fuh de same reason, and imagine that is a party that does tek anybody.
Ting-a-ling-a-ling…friend tell friend…mattie tell mattie! But is a lotta other waste get cut from de PPP/C. Just look at Rum Karran and see fuh yuhself.
Jokes of de week
April 12, 2013 By
Some people does live dem lives in peace and wait till other people praise dem. Others does like to praise dem own selves. I never expect that Baddamn was into this self praisin business.
I thought Baddamn woulda leave that fuh Mook Lall. Since nobody does praise de Mook, he does want fuh praise heself all de time, and then tell he staff fuh praise he too. It must be that de pressure from de Mook to write so much lies and misinformation finally get to Baddamn.
Baddamn had de guts to seh that he don’t like confrontation. Well, I know Baddamn does mek people laugh sometimes, but this one was a real good joke.
All through Baddamn life he help de PEE NC rig elections, write lies at de Chronicle and No News Nation, talk lies at de Slime News, write more lies at de Kocheur, and join a protest fuh de Mook who can’t get a radio and TV licence because he got a “sketchy” past.
Another joke of de week was wid Kydney Allcock who cock de people in de Rupununi and then turn he back and bad talk dem. I thought was only de Mook had that kinda ability to turn he back pun people, or fuh people.
Now everybody callin fuh Allcock to apologise and to stop cocking dem. De Rupununi people even protest when de FLAPNU people turn up to talk bout de budget and chase dem way. Now Green Jah don’t know what to do wid Allcock since he cock up de whole party.
Soon, nobody from FLAPNU gon sit down next to Allcock in Parliament, because dem gon friken Allcock cock dem too.
Ting-a-ling-a-ling…friend tell friend…mattie tell mattie! The other joke(r) of de week was Freddie de Man Kisser who seh that Guyana got plenty secrets. Indeed that is true, because de Man Kisser still ain’t tellin people how he manage fuh carry way dem books in Canada and from de UG library!
Dem boys holdin plenty meetings
April 2, 2013 By
Now that dem boys now got all de rejects like Lie Man Nagga Man, Rum Jhaat, Sus Penders Rum and Fool Sarran, among others, de group get a lil big now. So dem boys does hold plenty meetings to talk bout what next dem gon complain.When de whole group turn up, dem does meet at de Peg Ass Hot Hell. When de group not so big, dem does meet right pun de couch in Saffon Street.
Well, de couch really mek only fuh Baddam and de Mook, but it could hold a few more if yuh squeeze up tight. After all, is all dem boys tight – wid each other, that is. And since not all of dem boys is boys, dem don’t really mind squeezing up close to one another.
De last time dem meet at the Peg Ass Hot Hell, Robber Bad Al couldn’t tek it no more. He look through de window and see de Marriott goin up fast.
Is right away he realise he shoulda bring in Chinese to do de repair wuk on he Hot Hell and not dem Trinis.
De way tings goin, dem Chinese gon finish de Marriott construction before dem Trinis finish de Hot Hell renovation. And de renovation start before de construction.
De Robber had seh de Guyanese workers wukkin too slow, so he ain’t bother to consider dem fuh de renovation contract.
Ting-a-ling-a-ling… friend tell friend… mattie tell mattie! One of de maintenance workers in de Peg Ass yard seh that even when de renovation done in de next five years, it gon still be a Hot Hell.
Payin people to protest
April 2, 2013 By
It got an old sayin that talk about some people who does play dead to see what kinda funeral dem gon get. In de real world, that is de same as tellin people yuh sick, and then waitin to see how many of yuh friends and family gon call yuh or come and see yuh.
De Kocheur News, Mook Lall and Baddamn just add a new dimension to that old sayin. Call a protest, see how many people gon show up, watch how many media houses gon cover de event, and check if dem gon carry any story. Well, dem get a rude awakenin.
The first sign that tings gon go wrong is when Baddamn didn’t show up. Baddamn seh de Mook payin he to write not to protest. Baddamn even seh that de Mook shoulda be paying he to tink fuh he, because de Mook cant tink fuh he self.
Wid time goin and no body turnin up to protest, de Mook start to panic, just like when it was he 50 (+ 10) birthday party and he start callin people. De Mook call Stabber News, Yas Sin, Bad Al, Rum Jhaat and Lie Man Nagga Man. But non ah dem show up.
It was then de Mook decide fuh bring all he staff fuh go pun de street wid he. A reporter fuh de Kocheur seh de Mook offer a bonus and threaten every body to fire dem if dem don’t join de protest. De reporter was goin to write a story bout that, but Baddamn stop he right in he tracks.
Ting-a-ling-a-ling…friend tell friend…mattie tell mattie!
De Mook losin control
March 22, 2013 By
